.....

A supposingly happy occasion today. Sigh. 9th month...

There's always a reason of a long sleeve shirt.
1) to keep warm
2) to prevent others from asking why there are mosquito bites on the hand.
3) to prevent them from biting you.
4) to minimise the pain from self torturing
5) to hide scars


Orientation camp 2 have started today. It's going to end on the leap day of this unique leap year.
I am going back on JJ night tomorrow. Going to see the 2nd intakes having fun. I totally forgot all my dance movements. Hmm... Nevermind, it wont matter anyway. I hope I do get some laughter tomorrow, even if it's just a second.

I have been trying to force myself to sleep. Sleep and sleep. Sleep and not wake up in the middle of the night. Sleep and not wake up at 6am. Sleep not knowing the surroundings. Force Force Force. and still I am in the process of forcing myself to sleep. And this process is going to continue.

I hate the stupid thrmometer of mine. lol. I shall change a new thermometer if I manage to remember.


Suffering from cold turkey is extremely terrible.
It's a habit I have been so used to yet I have to stop.
I once told you that I would go nuts for not being able to find you. Yet you never believe it.
Everynight as usual, I would stare at my house phone, hoping the other end would be you. When it din rang, I decided to call. But I know you are having camp now, busy enjoying yourself now... I pressed the number, tempting to press the call button. I stopped and threw the phone away. On the floor, on the bed, far far away from me. I should be glad that the phone still lasted now and I have been throwing it for the past few weeks.

My stupid fingers. =.=
Unknowingly or maybe purposely, I .......


I am afraid that something might happen to my eyes for I keep blinking and felt it dry. Perhaps I should get eye mo later.
I am glad that I still can move my left hand. But now, near the elbow, there's some pain. It should be a good thing that I feel pain. At least it proves that I am alive. Maybe I just knock it against the chair. Hmm. Not that sure myself.

I should start worrying of my stomach. In the past, Jerome would be wanting to murder me for not eating. But now...
If Ah gong jinxing ever know about me not eating my meals, I think he will scold me as usual and force me to eat.
Now I am not hungry. My first meal of today shall be the meal in nanhua. 2nd meal would be home food.


Cold turkey treatment for another habit is starting soon.
Habit of sending him smses. He is having camp now so even if you do sms him, he wont reply. Yet you cant help yourself to not sms him. How foolish do you want to be? more self torture is going to occur...